♪ MVA ♪ ♪ MVA ♪
♪ Monsters vs. Aliens ♪
♪ It's us vs. them ♪
♪ Foe vs. friend ♪
♪ Brain vs. B.O.B. ♪
♪ It's a super-freaky job ♪
Oh, yeah, it's freaky.
♪ MVA ♪
♪ Monsters vs. Aliens ♪
[cackles]
♪ Monsters vs. Aliens ♪
♪ MVA ♪
1x30 - The Mystery of Dr. Cutter
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~
And so, Stacy Spyglass tiptoed down the secret staircase,
unaware of the danger lurking below...
[B.O.B. whimpering]
It was the ghostly phantom!
Aah! Aah!
Luckily, Stacy's pet sidekick, Constable Quackley,
sprung a trap! But the mystery wasn't over yet.
For the phantom's true identity was...
the old sea captain!
♪ Dun dun dah! ♪
- Jaw... drop. - Yeah! Quite the twist.
Still... dropping.
Attention, team Alien and team Monster leaders.
Report to the hangar, double-time and ASAP!
Sorry, B.O.B., looks like you're on your own for story time.
[jaw flapping]
Oh! What an ending.
I should have known the sea captain was evil.
He had an eye patch and everything... oh!
Welcome to Area Fifty-something, Doctor.
Allow me to introduce Susan Murphy, AKA Ginormica.
- Hey, I... - Eye!
I... I? I... am so happy to meet you.
Right back at ya, with a heaping side of...
gee-wolly-wow!
That's a lot of quantonium you're packing.
Um... thanks?
Susan, meet Dr. Cutter,
Uncle Sam's head of research and development!
I prefer "nourisher of now and future doodads."
So, less mad scientist...
And more glad scientist! [giggling]
I don't usually allow this level of perky on base,
but the Doc here's a top-level U.S. of a R&D I.T. VIP!
- Or is she... - Oh...
Hello, you... aaaaah!
Both: B.O.B.!
Remove your mask, evildoer! I see through your eye patch!
Unhand my VIP!
- Aah! - B.O.B., stop!
[B.O.B. screaming] Sorry I'm late.
Working up the effort to care took some...
[groans]
[exhales] Sorry, General.
B.O.B. gets a little too into his mystery books.
It was the Doctor and the butler!
♪ Dun dun dun! ♪
He's going to be too "into" solitary confinement
if you don't keep him away from Dr. Cutter!
[grunting, muttering]
Oh, my! Do you feel any brain pain?
[gasps] Ohh...
[harp playing]
You know, I don't usually say this to Earth ladies,
but... [squishy, flirty growl]
[romantic music]
Aha!
This is just like Stacy Spyglass and the missing diamond sneakers.
Dr. Eye patch is an evildoer, and I'm gonna prove it!
No! This is nothing like your books!
Let's see... spyglass, gumshoes, waffles in a sock... good to go!
Um... How 'bout you look for clues someplace she'll never suspect?
You know, someplace far away from Dr. Cutter?
Oh, like in her room? Great idea, Constable Quackley!
[giggles]
B.O.B., this isn't what I meant! We can't be here!
And really, I'm the duck?
Shh! Inside quacks only! We're sneaking!
Remember, if you find a big clue,
you're supposed to say, "clue-reka!"
Nope.
Nope. Nope.
- Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. - B.O.B., stop!
[crash]
Mm... nope!
Aah!
Why does Dr. Cutter have a giant robot?
[gasps] Put everything back!
Just a moment, Mr. Clumsy head.
I won't feel right starting my work until I know you're unharmed.
Oh, you can check out this body all day long.
[squishy, flirty growl]
[Susan gags]
Now, relax and let Dr. Cutter flex your cortex
and massage that medulla. [shudders, moans]
Dear Doctor, between the lobes?
How deliciously forward of you.
[Susan gagging]
Aah!
Brain pain! So much...
- Good golly! - Brain pain!
This mystery is even more suspicious-ier than I thought!
B.O.B., there's nothing suspicious about Dr. Cutter.
I mean, she likes Coverton, which is weird, but I'm
sure there's some totally innocent reason for the robot.
Oh, silly Quackley! Ha ha ha!
Your tiny duck brain can't unravel big mysteries.
This is just like the curse of the mummy's goatee,
and Stacy solved that case by getting a hair sample from the villain.
B.O.B., you know you're not allowed
- to play with scissors! - Oh, I know.
That's why I'm gonna blast off a hair sample with a plasma cannon.
What? No! No! Aah!
[overlapping yelling, Susan screaming]
Sorry!
[all screaming]
Hey, wash your hands! [toilet flushes]
[laser blast] Aah! I wasn't finished!
[Susan screaming, laser firing]
Your brain scans are a holiday basket of wow!
Mm. You see the size of that medulla?
All Cove-man. [chortles]
Oh, look, now I'm lifting weights.
It's so easy, sometimes I can't even tell.
Oh, look, I'm juggling. Is there nothing my brain can't do?
Ooh... ow!
Whoops. Oh, pardon me. I have to cover this up.
Henry never hurt nobody. Why?
[exhales] Too... close.
As always, Monger is... [sing-song] clueless!
Truly, the good General is such a delight to deceive.
- She's fooling Monger? - Called it!
B.O.B., I'm not saying you're right,
but we need to find out who she was talking to.
Oh! Stacy always uses a disguise for this kind of thing,
and I've got one!
Hey girl!
My name's Boberta, and I'm from Area Fifty-something high!
Gooo, fish!
Well, aren't we a dazzling display of insanity?
Ready? Okay! This is my cheer!
It's over here! Right over here!
Not behind your back! O-M-G!
That spells OMGuh! Nothing rhymes with OMGuh!
Except for fromguh! I'm running out of words!
Bananas are friendly! Kangaroo pants!
[gasps]
And then Brandon was like, "I heard you texted Chad!"
And I was all like, "From who? T.M.I. Tina?
She just likes the attention!"
You don't have a brain. So I'm not interested. Toodles!
B.O.B., Dr. Cutter's planning to attack Monger!
That's what the giant robot is for!
♪ Dun dun dun! ♪
Stop! It's a trap! [grunts]
[elongated] Nooo!
Why's B.O.B. acting slo-mo?
General, Dr. Cutter's evil! She's attacking you!
Whoa, doggy! Now, that's what papa likes!
[grunting]
And you're really enjoying it... a lot.
- Whoo-hoo! - Too much!
It's just a little upgrade to Monger's sparring bot.
No big deal... even though it kinda was.
So... it's a gift?
Aw, thanks, Doc. Mighty thoughtful.
Then how does she explain secret phone call
in the hall? Totes ominous and spooky?
[beep] Truly, the good General is such a delight to deceive.
[giggles]
A daily journal nourishes the mind and the soul.
- [thud] Ha ha! - Oh! Well...
then, I guess I accused you of being all evil-y for nothing.
Or did I?
- Gah! - Nope! Still your face.
Back, human, back. That's a very, very bad human.
[thud] Sorry, Doc.
Susan's been reading too many mystery books lately.
Yay! We solved it!
Good job, Quackley! Have some quackers!
- No, B.O.B., we didn't solve anything! - Really? Huh.
Well, this is probably one of those things
I'd understand if I had a brain.
- Brain? - Whoosh!
- Do you feel any brain pain? - Whoosh!
Now relax, and let Dr. Cutter
flex your cortex and massage that medulla.
- Whoosh! - Your brain scans
are a holiday basket of wow!
Whoosh!
- Whoosh! - Clue-reka!
She's really after Coverton!
Uh, dear Doctress.
I am unfamiliar with this Earth courtship custom,
- but, you know... game. - Everything is in its happy place.
Back away, Doc.
- The alien stays. - Hello?
Biggest third wheel in history!
Dr. Cutter wants to steal you. That's why she's really here!
The robot's crate wasn't just a crate.
It was a prison... for you, Coverton!
Pfft. Steal me. Lies!
- Nope. She nailed it. - Say what?
Your alien brain will help me unlock the secrets of...
say it with me now... telekinesis!
- Ooh! Ahh! - Well, that's not so bad.
Who's up for some... [sing-song] cranial extraction?
[saw buzzing]
Aah! Ooh!
Aah! Oh, jeez! [laser ricocheting]
Seriously, that's the brain you want?
Oh, no, you've foiled me! My ruse is ruined! My scheme!
My brilliant... my... kidding!
[chortles] You see, Ms. Murphy,
in a real mystery, the villain always traps the hero.
Oh, well, I'm not the hero.
I'm the duck! Now, B.O.B.!
Clue-reka!
Ooh!
[crash]
Cutter fail.
So, thought you'd bag yourself an alien, eh?
Well, you've just won a paid trip to the shores of court-martial island!
Courtesy of W.R. Monger... harsh but fair!
That is fair. And Susan... Susan, right?...
it was truly a treat and a half to tangle with you!
But I will taste vengeance!
Oh, look, a plane ride. Fun!
That there lady's nuttier than a squirrel's breakfast.
- You're welcome, Coverton. - Please. I would've solved it sooner.
For I am Cove-man, the great brain.
- Or are you? - Evildoer! [screams]
1x31 - The Partymobile That Invaded Earth
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~
[munching, slurping]
[prolonged yell] [crash]
[laughing]
Whoa, whoa, whoa, Bobby. What's going on?
Thing!
See! Come! [laughing]
Excuse me!
[muzak playing]
[ding]
[B.O.B. laughing]
Ta-da!
Whoa! I didn't even know we had this hangar.
Okay, so what's underneath the tarp?
[boom]
You think there's something underneath the tarp?
Oh, wow, yeah, that'd be even more amazing!
[triumphant music]
Whoa. Is that...
[dramatic music]
Looks like a... flying saucer?
Classic.
[both wailing guitar riff]
Yeah, that means old, right?
Been here I'd say... 30, 35... 36 years.
Link, I mean, do you think it still... flying sauces?
- There's only one way to find out. - Do you still flying sauce?
We're gonna fix the UFO, B.O.B.
- We are going to fix you! - There you go.
[thrilling music]
[laughs]
Yeah! Ha!
[spray can hissing]
[both wailing guitar riff]
[engine revving]
And we shall call it, "the U-F-Ohhh, yeah."
Oh, Link, I got that one! Oh, this feels good!
Mmm... fudgie budgie bars.
None must ever know of our forbidden love.
[slurping]
[gasps] The Grand Coverlord has started the invasion without me?
Not yet! I-I'm not ready!
I just learned about fudgie budgie bars!
[giggling]
We've got one fully operational flying saucer,
two devil-may-care dudes, and zero self-discipline.
- What do we do first? - Play pretend alien invaders?
That... is hi-larious.
We could be all like, "people of Earth,
blah, blah, blah, evil! Ha ha ha."
- Can we make our own alien costumes? - How would we not? C'mon!
"Pretend alien invaders"?
Oh, just a big joke, are we?
Simpering imbeciles!
You shall learn just how funny we aliens can be!
- What are you guys doing? - Aah!
Oh, hey, Suze! We're just, uh, bringing donations...
to the hospital for...
- kids who have... - Clown allergies!
So the "kids" in this "hospital" are allergic to clowns?
Are you saying they don't deserve to have fun, Susan?
- No! I... - That just because
they have a clown allergy, they should be locked up and forgotten?
- I wasn't... - Because I, for one,
- cannot be that cruel! - They're only children, Susan!
Go! Help the children! Please!
[both wailing guitar riff]
You want to play alien?
Then let's play for keepsies.
Good-bye, communications microphone.
[both laughing]
And good-bye, Mr. Exit Hatch.
[chuckles]
Time to rock this alien invasion.
[rock music]
[gear shifts, engine revs]
[country music playing]
[engines rumbling, people yelling]
[both laughing]
Actual laser. We should probably label that button.
I'll just hide it under this rock.
[people screaming]
And now we run away.
I abduct your chicken! Ha ha, evil!
Aah!
You chicken-stealing maniacs!
I swear vengeance on all aliens!
Vengeance!
[phones ringing] Sir! The calls are coming in from all over.
Get that E.T. on comms! I wanna know if he's hostile!
Yes, sir! [click]
Alien craft, identify yourself.
Are you hostile?
- Well, buddy, looks like game over. - Aw...
Hey, guys, it's just us.
Havin' some fun, abductin' some chicken, you know, doin' like you do.
[garbled voice, static]
- What in the... - Sqweep? Dr. C?
- Anybody got a translation? - Nope.
- I am unfamiliar with this dialect. - It can't be!
[garbled voice continues]
That's the language of the Brocktoon!
A little-known but extremely warlike race that Sqweep
would never have heard of but I happen to know very well!
- I have never heard of the Brocktoon. - You see?! Oh, I only hope
they don't have a guitar-playing wizard and dancing leprechauns
painted on the side of their ship.
Affirmative. Plus what witnesses are calling, I quote... [click]
"a bear on a skateboard."
Aah! That's the worst of the lot!
I can't imagine what they would want,
but, oh, why not? I'll translate for you.
And you know, okay, sure, maybe we pushed it...
[garbled voice continues] "We are the ruin of your planet.
We will burn your cities and eat your house pets."
[all gasp]
Scramble everything we've got! I want that ufo D.O.A. ASAP, okay?
LOL. [chuckling]
I guess maybe there's something missing in my life,
and I try to fill it with hijinks and mayhem.
Hey, Link, I'm trying to remember. Missiles are the bad ones, right?
Just in the middle of something.
Was I a child? What... wait a minute, what?
Whoa!
[explosions]
- What the heck is going on? - A lotta shooting. You're yelling...
But we told them it's us! Put me on external loudspeaker.
Hey, everybody!
[garbled voice]
Ohh! The things they're saying about your mother!
I-I-I can't even repeat them!
Fire everything! For my mama!
It is Link and B.O.B. We are not... wait a minute.
Whoa!
The microphone is broken! They think we're real aliens!
That's crazy!
How could they not even notice we're not there?
Where are Link and B.O.B.?
- Visiting kids with clown allergies. - Good on them.
[shouts]
We have to find some other way to show them it's us!
B.O.B., move to the porthole!
- I'm gonna give them a visual! - Got it!
- It's the window. - Got it!
[camera snaps]
They're more hideous than I imagined!
- Lose the costume! - I'm wearing a costume?
Forget it! We have to abandon ship!
[gear whirring]
- Stupid hatch! Unstick! - Ugh!
Maybe we should ask the pilot to help.
There is no pilot, B.O.B. I'm flying the...
[engine whining]
[both screaming]
My tanks! [sniffling] I love my tanks!
Take no prisoners! Spare no weapons! Show no mercy!
General Monger! If we abduct him, we can explain everything.
Everything?
Okay. But you cover where babies come from,
because I do not get how that works.
The menace must be brought down, no matter what!
General, look out!
Oh, dear. Disregard all previous statements
on showing no merc... oof!
Aww, Coverton! I was trying to get Monger!
They've abducted Coverton! Everyone, hold your fire!
No! Coverton was right.
We must bring the enemy down, no matter what!
It is what he would have wanted!
[battle cry] Aaaah Staaa'aaabi!
You have lasers. Use them, for glurm's sake!
[gasps] Broverton! Those are our friends!
No, B.O.B., he's right. They've left us no choice.
Arming lasers...
[men yelling]
Aah!
You wanna cha-cha, little green men?
All units, concentrate simultaneous fire on three!
- One... Two... - No, wait! Look!
- Link and B.O.B.? - "Please stop shooting us."
[sighs] I guess. Stand down, soldiers!
- Aw... - Oh...
Don't worry, everybody.
The kids are all safe from clown allergies.
Because we totally made that up.
- Oh, Boy. - Link! B.O.B.!
You two jokers are gonna be scrubbing so many latrines,
you'll think you got married and had toilet babies!
That is the weirdest and most terrifying threat I've ever heard.
And let that be a lesson to you: never try to play alien!
Leave that to me, the alien!
- Alien! - What the... Ow!
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~